Claudaism
From CGWiki
Contents |
What the dilly-o?
In the November of our Claude's year 2005, RYClaude became Pope Claude the 1st.
Among his followers were the Badge'd Holy Knights of Outrage consisting of Mercury hat, CJ Burgandy, Legostar, Mr. Bob, and Corgan Dane, plus others. He Gathered around him a Holy Hat Harem who sit within his pope hat, these were Black Sparrow, Pierce Studios and M2.
By his side is Vice Pope Rock_dash and Cardinal Faceless. Also in his service were Keffria, Vorticus, and occasionally the executioner and PR manager, Cookie.
He took the Vatican by force, the knights assisting in kiling the Giant Spider Queen of the Drows, Mercury Hat dealing the killing Blow. The Vatican was then given Giant Rocket Engines by Legostar and launched into space as an unstoppable orbital Headquarters, Earthbound acts were to be seen through by those in charge of the RoboChurches which walk on enormous Chicken legs.
Beliefs
Claudaism stems from RYClaude's comic Reckless Youth, the gospel which deals with the idea that God takes many forms no one of them being the definitive. This means any form of worship is okay, be it prayer, dance or wooshing Jim North upshoosh tha foosh. Claudists are allowed to believe and worship however they like.
However they do have to attend Robochurch at least once a month, and be regularly outraged.
This general freedom and disorganisation makes it possibly the most backwards religion this side of Discordianism and the most screwed up one since Scientology, thus making it perfect for widespread worship on the forums.
Opposition
Due to the actions of Holy Knight Mr.Bob, Claudaism was landed with the blame for attempting to blow up the Houses of parliament. This resulted in Seperatists (read: War) beginning the Church of Comic Genesis, who renounced the Claudist view. The creation of this new group drew First the Holy knight Mercury Hat and then Holy Knight CJ away from the Pope's cause.
Jim North, founder and leader of the Existentialist Army for Truth and More Excellence (EAT ME), disagrees with the Claudist church on philisophical grounds. He believes that everyone should find their own truth instead of throwing themselves at the mercy of organized religion. Especially one whose members are outraged so easily and tend to woosh upshoosh the foosh at the drop of a hat. He also advocates free beer while Claudists merely have that little wine-tasting thing. And they claim it's the blood of Claude! How creepy is that?!
The above paragraph brought to you by the existentialist army for truth and blah blah blah
DarkMagician voiced his opposition to Claudism and EAT ME, saying that both were in fact derivative works of Boxism, corrupted by Satin. He was ignored.
In mid to late 2007, Lunar got a hat and declared himself Pope of something or other. While not considered a threat to the word of Claude, he's still a dirty, dirty heretic and should be ignored at all costs.
Holidays
- August the 8th - The feast of 88. (also known as two fat ladies)
