User:Derenge
From CGWiki
| The bare facts | |
|---|---|
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| Alias(s): | Derenge |
| Real name: | Micheal Derenge |
| Comic: | Pointless |
| CG signup date: | |
| Birthday: | |
| Birth location: | |
| Current residence: | |
| Website | [ Website] |
More than he can bare
It is said among many that as an infant, the boy Derenge was coated in a a rare and exotic wild honey said to have magical properties and left outside a bear cave high in the rocky mountains as some sort of tribute to please the ancient ones. Derenge had a no qualms in being sacrificed for the greater good of the season�s crop, but after a fortnight of nothing happening had passed he had no choice but to eat the honey covering his body or be suffocated in the swarm of flies that had built up around him. Upon investigation of the cave later, nothing was to be found except for a forwarding address to New Jersey.
The whole significance of these strange childhood events toward his even stranger attraction of bears today is unknown and is declared moot in most circles purely because of the pure unbridled hilariousness people derive out of watching him being mauled.
Later reflection on the part of esteemed scholars of CGenology (or just MixedMyth's mad ass ramblings) theorizes that the honey that Derenge devoured was, in fact, Doombee honey.
