Comic:Dominic Durgan
From CGWiki
| Dominic Durgan | |
|---|---|
| |
| Artist: | Mookie |
| Writer: | Dookie |
| Characters: | Dominic Durgan, Mongo, Chaz Durgan, Pretty Princess Sephiroth, Mystery Orb, a cat |
| Updates: | Whenever |
| Began: | "May 21, 2003" |
| Ended: | |
| Art style: | Comic strip |
| Rating: | Web-MA |
| Website | Website |
Dominic Durgan is a completely unlikeable character. He is violent, ignorant, bigoted in every imaginable way and swears almost constantly. He lives with a cat which he hates and continuously tries to kill but it simply refuses to die. Later additions to his macabre menagerie of horrors are Mongo, a retard with occult powers, and Chaz, his womanising younger brother. Nobody likes any of them (except Mongo, because she's nice).
They all have stupid adventures and nobody cares.
Contents |
Plot
The story so far: Dominic Durgan is your average proud white American. He attends lynchings, he distributes race hate literature, he masturbates furiously and tries to ignore the strange urges he feels around men. He also is in possession of the Mystery Orb, a table lamb from the future that can also play DVDs and CDs. Nobody really cares, until Pretty Princess Sephiroth (the most beautiful transsexual princess what ever was) decides she wants it for some reason. Then she doesn't care, and they have sex.
Some old bat comes to visit, claiming she's the penis inspector. She is not. She is a hooker. She wants the Mystery Orb! She doesn't get it, and leaves in a sulk. Then Dominic battles against the forces of the Space-Fish that seek to destroy humanity through kinetic energy. Their subtle tactics of falling on his head do not work, as Dominic's head is of extraordinary thickness, and so they step up to atomic weaponry. This makes Dominic's brain radioactive and becomes a completely ridiculous plot point.
Desperate to get laid again, Dominic Durgan enlists the help of two perverts who also happen to be well-reputed doctors. They demand oral pleasure as payment, and Dominic tries not to act too excited about it. Some other stuff happens, and soon the two deviant doctors at a very large house that looks like a castle. They fail to have a picnic, but that doesn't matter. What does matter is Pretty Princess Sephiroth is visiting the owner of the castle, who is the hooker from the last paragraph! Her name is Angel Heaven. She is not a penis inspector, despite what she might tell you.
Angel Heaven offers to show Pretty Princess Sephiroth a trained chimp. Pretty Princess thinks that would be peachy-keen, but then gets a horrible paranoia attack. But surprise of surprises! The trained chimp is not a trained chimp, it is a retard named Mongo who have a wicked underbite. Mongo bites Sephiroth with an outcome that is horribly painful for the Pretty Princess hilarious for anyone else.
Meanwhile, Dominic Durgan is an idiot and suffering from terrible atomic headaches. He dresses up like Doctor Who and goes off to get laid. He fails miserably and ends up meeting up with Mongo, who is entranced by some lovely rope. Molestation of varying degrees occurs, and to cut a long story short someone dies (it is Angel Heaven and she is not a penis inspector) and Mongo brutalises Pretty Princess Sephiroth again for no good reason. Dominic doesn't get laid and Mongo tries to get a job but finds she is over-qualified.
Dominic tries to kill the cat, Mongo tries to kill Dominic, some other stuff happens. They end up all living together due to comedic circumstances and then the actual plot starts about here.
Characters
Dominic Durgan
Dominic grew up in a trailer in the Deep South, without either of his parents. His mother died of "weeping eye" and his father was shot when holding up a liquor store. He got through his troubled childhood by masturbating constantly. He is a violent racist who hates women and his intellectual superiors, which is pretty much everyone. He is also gay but refuses to admit it because he feels it would make him less of a proud Aryan. He has a poster of Hitler above his bed and a swastika tattoo on his genitals, among other things. He can barely read and has severe trouble in tying shoelaces. He is also extremely, lethally terrible at cooking. He also likes rap, despite hating black people, and enjoys smoking marijuana every day at 4:20.
Dominic's current worry, besides being gay, is his radioactive brain which is slowly killing him. According to a hallucination of a pretty little girl, he has mere months to live. Occasionally he develops atomic headaches, which can cause horrifying nightmare visions and severe pain. Beyond the atomic headaches, the radioactive brain is a rather benign illness.
Mongo
Mongo was formerly a brilliant archaeologist who happened to unearth and read a powerful occult book that listed the true names of the Elder Gods that dwell beyond the reaches of man. The dire knowledge completely shattered her fragile mortal mind and left her a drooling moron. However, she still retains an instinctive knowledge of how to summon and exploit the occult powers of the Old Ones. Besides this horror, she is a well-meaning and pleasant individual who has a zest for life. She likes ham and puppies best of all.
Incarcerated for a time by Angel Heaven (who is too female to be the penis inspector) she was involved in a variety of creepy pornographic films that only filthy disgusting perverts would watch. After Angel Heaven was decapitated by Pretty Princess Sephiroth in a horrible accident, she went swimming and ended up passing out when Dominic dumped several barrels of a date-rape drug into the river. Drawn to him for some mysterious reason, she opted to stay in his house even though Dominic wishes to use her occult powers to make himself king of all men.
Mongo can bake very well and can also tie shoelaces. However, she cannot read at all. Many envy her for being the most popular character. In order to avoid her occult powers consuming her, she must consume human flesh and blood. Generally she follows Dominic around for no particular reason, and often tries to cheer him up when he's depressed even though he totally doesn't deserve it. Mongo often states that she can see "ghosties" which might not actually exist.
Chaz
Chaz is Dominic's stoner brother and remains baked 24 hours a day. He is so high he has to prop himself up with a stick to stop himself from falling over. Nobody actually likes him, not even Mongo. He is a kindergarten dropout, much like his brother Dominic, and raised himself in the woods around the trailer where they both grew up. This, combined with the constant drug abuse, has rendered him rather dim. Still, he remains the smartest out of the three, but only just barely. He has a very complicated tattoo that he likes a lot.
He is something of a ladies' man, being able to bag any number of women at any point, but is also incredibly sexist and enjoys beating them. Chaz also enjoys beating people who are not women, as long as they don't have even the slightest chance of defending themselves. Another thing he enjoys is dressing up in lingerie. He is straight, unlike Dominic.
The Mystery Orb
The Mystery Orb is a mysterious orb that usually sits atop a small pedestal. It is a table lamp from the future that has been seen to play CDs, broadcast audio and visual messages from the future and also illuminate a room quite nicely. It also has limited flight capacity. Other abilities/powers are so far unknown but probably just as mysterious. It is the second-most likeable character in Dominic Durgan, after Mongo, because of its innocuous presence and complete lack of personality traits. Because it's a table lamp. From the future.
Its main purpose is to relay important messages from Dominic Durgan of the year 2028 to the Dominic Durgan of the present. The future Dominic appears to be a very pleasant individual, which is confusing because the current Dominic is a complete and utter jackass. Again, this is another of the mysteries of the Mystery Orb. Dominic (of the present, at least) sees it in a sexual light and considers himself married to it.
Pretty Princess Sephiroth
The most loveliest transsexual princess what ever was, Sephiroth is the de facto ruler of the area where Dominic lives. Which is weird, because Dominic lives in the United States and they don't have any princesses there at all. Oh well. Sephiroth is obsessed with his/her appearance and good looks to the point of absolute paranoia. He/she is also incredibly rough during sex and also not during sex.
Sephiroth has a love/hate relationship with Dominic that usually results in sex.
The Deviant Doctors
Two very skilled, very intelligent doctors who just happen to be colossal perverts obsessed with every fetish under the sun. In addition to working as a duo, they are in a happy open relationship together. Dominic hates them because they are not miserable like he is, and also because they like dudes.
Running Themes/Gags
- People getting crosseyed every f**kin' time.
- Pseudo-Lovecraftian mythos.
- Constant, possibly fatal, drug use.
- Hypocrisy.
- Racism.
Categories: Comedic | Cursed | English | Gay/Lesbian | Greyscale | Humor | Horror | Idiots | Parody | PNG | Rated Mature | Time Travel
